The curse of spotting the early signs of toxic behaviour: if you don't tell others they will be like "well how could we have known if you didn't tell us" later, but if you *do* tell them then they will take every opportunity to find justifications for why it's actually not that bad and they're not quite seeing it etc. etc.
@eater Yep, same - and I often *can* even explain them, but it requires like 3 hours of backstory and explaining the patterns, and I'll not get taken seriously the entire way through
@eater (And the listener rarely is interested in learning from the backstory either, so next time someone shows up showing the exact same patterns of behaviour, I get to start all over again)
@joepie91 I don't think I really could? it's trauma and hyper vigilance the patterns are stored in the brain but I can't access them
@eater Yeah, also understandable
@joepie91 yup, I always have "vibes" with people and they tend to be true 99% of the time, but good luck trying to explain that to people xD