advice for understanding FediBlock conflicts 

Like all rules of thumb, this is not universal, but it ends up being accurate *very* often: if two parties are accusing each other around a FediBlock listing, look at who is answering questions and providing explanations, and who is not.

All too often one party is being very cagey and vague in their claims and accusations, making claims that are broader than the available evidence would support. This is a red flag - it often means that there *is* no evidence, and that they know it.

(Them launching into some narrative about how "everybody is conspiring against me", "someone is trying to ruin me", etc. without a credible motivation is extra suspicious - you may be dealing with an abuser.)

Conversely, if someone is being very open about what happened, and can provide an explanation that doesn't leave any gaps and isn't suspiciously *slightly* different from what they were asked, that's often a sign that they're in the right.

Do be aware that there are circumstances where this doesn't apply, and this doesn't transfer as well to other kinds of conflicts - particularly for interpersonal abuse, evidence is not always available or possible to share. Those are messier to sort out.

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advice for understanding FediBlock conflicts 

@joepie91 These sound like good rules of thumb for navigating most conflict.
Though I've seen "evidence can't be shared, don't talk to them" abused too - and the language of victimhood ("they're harassing me, they're abusing me" without evidence). But I guess this falls into what you were saying earlier. And the key lesson probably is, it's messy and unless someone slips up, it's hard to tell...

advice for understanding FediBlock conflicts 

@joepie91 Most of the time that I've seen calls to add someone to a #FediBlock list, it has been as a tool of harassment directed against the victim

advice for understanding FediBlock conflicts 

@joepie91

I just think it's funny when I'm reading one of those threads, and there's a dude being all "I'm-the-soul-of-tact-and-reason" with another dude who's super upset. But then I realize Dude No. 1 jumped down my throat last year over just about the tiniest disagreement possible, before blocking me. lol. Where was his sympathy then?

I don't like to say that Everything Is Misogyny, but... Hmmm... 🤔

re: advice for understanding FediBlock conflicts 

@xenophora Not everything is misogyny, there's also racism, queermisia, ableism... 😐

(Please read in frustratedly sarcastic voice)

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