been trying to do dslr selfies (not that I like how I look anyways..) but it's impossible to do at arms length because of the cropped 50mm prime

what does seem to work well is focusing the camera towards the point where I'll be setting it down, keeping it on manual

@f0x I'd happily take some pics of you when an opportunity occurs. :)
Other than that, using a tripod, self-timer and manual focus is probably the best solution. You probably know that already, but using short focal lenghts for portraits is never a good idea because it distorts the proportions of the face. (Which, at least for me, also increases dysphoria.) A really good portrait at arms length seems rather impossible to me.

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