There's this common advice for activism in particular, but also politics in general, that goes something like: "people are imperfect, so you should learn to work with people even if you don't completely align with them".

And in a vacuum, that is true.

But what gets missed here is the *context* in which this advice often gets used. That context is very often "some marginalized person frequently calls out bigoted behaviour from their supposed allies, and now nobody wants to work with them".

In that context, the advice *technically* still works. The marginalized person *could* decide to let it slide, and work on the common interest instead.

But consider the implications of that, and what is actually being asked of whom. A marginalized person, who already gets the short stick most of the time, is expected to let bigotry slide... while zero expectations are placed on the *other* allies, particularly the privileged ones, who *could* take off some of the load by calling out their peers every once in a while at basically no risk to themselves. But nobody is expecting them to.

And just like that, all the emotional work and responsibility are pawned off on the people who can least afford it.