@alex I'm probably not the most qualified to speak on this because kink *is* associated with sexuality for me, though it's more in the sense that if it's only kink without sex, it doesn't feel like nothing, it just feels 'incomplete' to me.

If I had to explain kink categorically, I would say that it's... playing with risk in an intensely satisfying and intimately rewarding way. Whether that is physical risk, or social risk (power play, taboos, etc.), it always seems to involve doing something that is "risky" by some metric or other, but in a controlled environment and with calculated risk levels.

If I had to analogize it, I'd say it's probably closer to the reason that people enjoy horror movies and experiences, than it is to sexuality; it's experimenting and playing with risk in a relatively safe (and high-trust) environment to do so. I suspect the link with sexuality is mostly because it tends to cause similar emotions (so, presumably wired up similarly in the brain), rather than it being inherently sexual by itself.

The actual *reasons* for people to engage in kink are extremely varied. For some, it's a way to deal with trauma and 'gain control' over something that would otherwise be terrifying, for some it's about the intense and overwhelming feeling, for some it's the relaxation of 'inversion of control' (not being in control when they normally are expected to be, or vice versa), and so on, there are undoubtedly many reasons I've missed.

But all of it seems to be some flavour of "what if things were a bit different?", ie. experimenting with risk in some manner.

All this is just my personal understanding and interpretation, so it definitely shouldn't be taken as gospel, but hopefully it helps anyway 🙂