EDIT: folks found them! It turns out I was remembering multiple posts. Links below the original post (also below)
Someone once posted a really good writeup about how "you need to ban assholes who technically aren't breaking the rules because otherwise they will ruin the community". Does anyone remember / know where to find it?
https://eev.ee/blog/2016/07/22/on-a-technicality/
https://retro.social/@ifixcoinops/111008076839685387
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@kae_bytheocean That was probably the massive community management thread by @ifixcoinops?
@joepie91 yes indeed, this was one of them! thank you!