ACAB
hey so uh can i ask for advice
so there is this friend group i used to have since high school and we haven't been really talking ever since we graduated
and we started talking again and i suddenly realize that i changed too much for me to be comfortable with them
i am too gay, too trans, too queer, too leftist, too furious, too furry and "sjwlike" for them
and while they didn't do anything wrong towards me i simply don't feel like i wanna associate with them
(1/2)
and the problem is that
i used to be good friends with them and i owe them a lot
they're genuinely good people but i see a lot of bigoted casual shit that i just can't ignore
and leaving them out like this outta nowhere makes me feel like an asshole
but at the same time i am no doormat
i don't want to be treated like this and i will not
so what do i do?
personal advice
@mynameistillian My first instinct would be to be loudly yourself, and see how they respond. If they respond with bigoted commentary, tell them that the commentary hurts you, and see what they do with it.
If they still consider themselves your friends, they will learn from that and adapt - they might just need a better reference in life.
If they insist on continuing their behaviour, downplaying your concerns, then they are not really your friends, even if they were in the past - and I would tell them upfront that you don't really want to hang around them if they are going to be like that.
You ultimately don't owe anyone anything except for a fair chance. If they decide not to take that chance, then that is their choice, and the consequences are theirs too.
